Dad's last chemo was December 30, 2015 and I came to the realization that it has done all the possible good that it can at this point. A year ago, Dad's PSA was 101. The PSA has been wavering between 15 and 11 and it is possible that it won't get any lower. The PSA is an indicator. It's not a perfect indicator but it's the best one; sometimes the only one. Thankfully, for the last 20 years, the PSA has proven to be a perfect indicator for Dad, though.
While chemo has obviously done its job in ridding Dad's body of the majority of the cancer, it also has started doing more damage. The last two treatments were incredibly harsh on Dad and he was not able to bounce back as he had between previous treatments. The neuropathy in his feet, legs, arms, hands and jaw is almost unbearable. Chronic fatigue and exhaustion have taken control of his body. For a man who has been self sufficient and extremely active his entire life, this new way of life is very frustrating, to say the least. To have to depend on others, to struggle in daily tasks and to realize you have to ask for help is not fun. This is the new normal. It's not fair but it's reality.
Yesterday, we got the results of Dad's bone scan which showed some progression of disease and some decrease in disease. All in all, we're looking at stable disease right now which is honestly, all we can ask for at this point. Once Dad's prostate cancer metastasized to the bone, we knew he would never be cancer free again. It's about managing the cancer at this point. The bone scan is definitely better than it was in January 2015. However, because there is still disease present we could, and perhaps should, continue chemo. However, at this point, we chose to take a break. It's time for a chemo vacation.
Chemo is the necessary evil that has saved my father's life but at the same time it's the necessary evil that is slowly destroying his quality of life. Chemo is doing more harm than good. Dad's body needs a break. His body needs time to recover and regain strength.
After the doctor's appointment, we decided to celebrate the official start of chemo vacation at our happy place with the Friday night wine tasting. Mom and Dad hadn't felt up to going out in a while but a short visit would definitely do us all some good! After all, celebration was in order!!!
Dad goes back to the doc late March, we'll monitor the PSA and bloodwork and take things one step at a time. For now, we are extremely thankful for the chemo break and are embracing each day as it comes. It's time to get Dad's strength back so he can keep kicking cancer's ass!
Don't take your life for granted, my friends. At any given moment, life as you know it can change. Thank you for the continued prayers. Please keep them coming. This is far from over!
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Through all of it
-Colton Dixon
There are days of taking more than I can give
and there are choices that I made that I wouldn’t make again
I’ve had my share of laughter
of tears and troubled times
This has been the story of my life
I have won and I have lost
I got it right sometimes, but sometimes I did not
Life’s been a journey
I’ve seen joy, I’ve seen regret
Oh, and You have been my God through all of it
You were there when it all came down on me
When I was blinded by my fear and I struggled to believe
But in those unclear moments You were the one keeping me strong
This is how my story’s always gone
I have won
And I have lost
I got it right sometimes, but sometimes I did not
Life’s been a journey
I’ve seen joy, I’ve seen regret
Oh, and You have been my God through all of it
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